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dying to live

Guys, we are halfway through the first month of 2015! How did this even happen?!?


I am absolutely amazed at how fast time flies now that I work from home. I used to think the days passed quickly when I worked full time. But now it’s like the hands of the clock are spinning mercilessly round and round, bringing to close another day, another week, another year.


I am so thankful. Seriously, SO thankful for where God has me stationed right now. I don’t know if it’s because I’m getting older(ish) or because of my faith, but I seem to have a more profound sense of my mortality and the fleetingness of it all. I know we are only one-twenty-fourth of the way through the new year, but I already feel like 2015 is being marked by more intentionality, a keener sense of what is real, and a focus on my purpose for my years here on earth. I am a warrior stationed behind enemy lines. “I will join with the others in suffering, like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. For no one serving as a soldier gets entangled in civilian affairs, but rather tries to please their commanding officer.”


My life here on this earth is making more sense and yet, at the same time, less sense. The harder I try, the less I accomplish. The more I let go, the more ground I cover. The less I own, the more I have. The less I think about writing, the more words bombard my brain just begging to be released onto a sheet of paper.


When I TRY to be like God, I fail, but when I LET God be through me I succeed.


Friends, Jesus was not kidding when He said His Kingdom is not of this world. It is utterly antithetical to this world. Upside down. Inside out. Bottom up. The first are last, and the last are first. He is a radical God that reigns over the craziest, most radical of kingdoms.


It’s funny, for years I have known all these things in my head, but now I am beginning to know it in my heart. I am not becoming like God, He is coming alive in me. I am slowly dying, withering away, but He is coming alive. As John the Baptist once so prophetically said, “He must become greater; I must become less.”


Do your thing, Jesus. Do your thing.